Setting the Record Straight: Wedding Morning Realities

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And today we're gonna be clapping back. I'm sure you've heard of the clip circulating the internet right now about photographers blaming hair and makeup artists on setting up their timelines for failure during the day. So we just wanna give you a little bit of our. Take and some experiences that we've had and share together while working behind the scenes during the wedding day. And I know you have an example, you're ready to share, so take it away. Yes, absolutely when we did see the video, I felt like I. It was one sided, right? So they know their area, they know what they have to do that day, and I just felt like they were a little out of touch of what everybody else has to deal with. So I understand they need a lot of time. I understand they have a long day, they have x amount of pictures and expectations to get, but what they're losing sight of is, so do we. So we, as hair and makeup, we're the first ones there, right? We are also working with the timelines by these photographers. Now first looks are a big deal. Now it's getting to be a first look with the, dad, the dad and the sometimes the mom and, or the grandpa and the bridesmaids. And so all of that really bumps up their timeline, which I feel like a lot of brides are not really necessarily aware of. And they're not really aware of how much time it takes to do hair. That's what we have to deal with. So that means earlier start times for us to accommodate so they can get all their pictures done. However, when we're the first one to start and you have a issues where people are either late or you can't get into the room to set up on time those are things that we have to deal with and we do, block out extra time. We give cushion room, we like it to run smoothly. But that doesn't mean it always necessarily happens. There's a lot of things that are out of our control. Um, I had one bride who showed up and she had a very large wedding party an hour and a half late with her whole bridesmaids, everybody. So me and the other artists are just standing there for an hour and a half, slowly freaking out inside of how are we going to get everybody done on time? That was one example and that happens a lot like where it does, it happened with us. Yeah. Where people aren't awake or, yes. I always tell everybody to, I don't care who goes first, I just need to have multiple people there because one of the other things in every makeup and hairstylist can relate to this is sometimes you get your person, they have soaking wet hair, even though you stress multiple times. For them to have clean, dried hair. Mm-hmm. Pictures of what they want, so it moves the process along. Doesn't always happen. So I can't style someone's hair who's soaking wet, and I didn't block in, half an hour to do a blowout. So then if I have another girl, I can swap it out. But that might not be the case. I've had some where they're like, oh, she's, she's just 15 minutes? She'll be here. She'll be here. Well, that 15 minutes then turns in by the time they get there, they say they're hellos. They put their stuff down to now a half hour, so now we're a half hour running behind. Mm-hmm. They don't, the photographers don't get to see all of this? No, no. And it's almost like, I wish we could record the morning so they see Exactly. Sometimes the fiasco that we deal with. There's one example that I really wanna share and I was working a wedding and I showed up for my 6:00 AM start time, 15 minutes early. So I was at the door, 5 45 brides locked out of her bridal suite and there's no attendant downstairs to let her in. Mm-hmm. And they didn't email her the code to get back in and it was also Mercury retrograde. Oh. So, you know, anytime with your travel or. Anything, you just give yourself that ample extra time. Yeah. But yeah, we ended up setting up shop in the lobby of the hotel because we had no other choice. We all hustled and worked together as a team, but we ended up finishing late because um, if we had started on time, we would've finished on time, but we started an extra 45 minutes late. Yeah. 'cause we just simply couldn't get into the bridal suite. And the bride was persistent on. Getting ready in the bridal suit. Yes. For that experience. And I understand that and her frustration, but it's like we have to keep the ball moving here because we're on tight timelines and everybody had thick course hair. There were some people that had, sopping wet. So it's like we are putting out all of these fires before any other vendor shows up. Exactly. And the other vendor, and we're the ones that are, you know this, they had their rehearsal dinner the night before. They probably stayed up late. So you're trying Yes. Drank too much. Yes. You're trying to get everybody there. I mean, we did, and I believe you were doing this wedding with me where I think it was a 5:30 AM start time and we're standing outside Yes. Of the salon suite. And no one's there. We're reaching out and the person who's supposed to start first was the mother. And she comes down, she goes, I thought you were kidding. I gotta finally, no, I'm not kidding. Yes, I remember that. Remember? Yes. And she goes, um, we looked at each other like, you're, you're serious, right? Like, please keep telling me you're joking. Right? Oh, I thought you were kidding. Meanwhile, we had gotten up at, I don't know, 3 30, 4 o'clock to get there, to be there on time. And then I remember trying to use her room key, and she goes, well, this one's not working. Well, of course it's not gonna work. This is a whole separate salon suite. So, and you're just in your head thinking, oh my God, the time's ticking, ticking, ticking. So that's, you know, something we deal, we deal with, anxieties, of, we've had brides that start, it starts hitting them that they're actually getting married today. And the nerves. The nerves. Mm-hmm. The tears. I've had brides that are getting up and going and throwing up multiple times as I'm trying to do their makeup. And then you're fixing all of that over and over again. A wedding. I just did. The flowers arrived and this happens a lot. And it was not her bouquet, so it was a completely different bouquet. And so they luckily, thank God they were close enough that they were like, okay, and an we will be back in an hour with a new bouquet. But again, that causes all this stress. Now you've got bridesmaids and the maid of honor trying to like take this off her plate. Mm-hmm. I've had somewhere, I'm literally fixing someone's bouquet. When I do hair, but hey, you're gonna do whatever you need to do. But those are like, you have people that are, oh, the food's here, or we have to open up gifts or who wants a Starbucks run? Yes, yes. My favorite. And so it's like, I'm just like, I need a button in the chair. I don't care who's, but I gotta like, we gotta keep this moving. So I feel like all of that, well, I guess, you know, maybe their intentions were good and they were just speaking of like what they experienced, but I feel like. I, I try to relate to all the vendors, you know, I wanna absolutely make sure that they're on time, that I'm not holding the photographer back. I know how stressful that could be. I know some of them are working for other people's companies. They don't wanna look bad, so I a hundred percent get it. But it's also, hair and makeup is not something that can be rushed either. It's, that's the whole point, is for them to look good on their day. Right? And if their hair and makeup doesn't look good, you can do all the editing you want, but their photos aren't gonna look good. And there are all these things and they just are in the mode of. This is the day I have, you still have all these things they're trying to get together. And I've had some where the bridesmaids are doing their nails in their toes, like it's, that should have been done the night before Mm-hmm. So I just feel like they should have really tried to put themselves in other people's shoes before they said, we love you, but Absolutely. So it's like, no, you don't like really try to see what we have to contend with. And now with these outrageous timelines for the photographers, it's even worse. Yeah. No, I totally agree with you there. I mean, I remember working the one wedding with you one time where we got to the, it was someone's house. Mm-hmm. So we set up at the house, and then there was a photographer throwing our things across the room, and we weren't even done. Like we had an extra, we had half hour left until the photographers were coming there. Yes. And. The photographer was throwing our things across the room to clear it out so that they could take pictures in the dining room or wherever we were. Yeah. It was a set, a wedding that was gonna be at a house and they literally were throwing our stuff and we weren't done yet. Like, and we still, that was our working time. That was not their working time. I always stressed to brides too, like. Once the photographer gets there, chaos. It's chaos. You can feel it's chaos. The anxiety, chaos. Chaos. Um, and that's why I don't do the bride last, like I want the bride done and ready, because when I was starting out and it was like, oh, where's your invitation? Where's your flowers? Where's your rings? And then like they're getting up and out of the chair repeatedly to get these things together for these photographers. And then they're getting anxious and they're getting nervous. So it's like. Now, I don't even do that. I will make sure the bride is done ahead of time because I don't wanna deal with that. And you have a photographer breathing down your neck, you're trying to do your job, and you can't because they're there with a camera shoved in the face. Mm-hmm. And you're trying to now move around them. So, and they do, they show up early. A lot of the times it's like, and that's okay if they wanna, grab those detailed shots, of, the invitations. Mm-hmm. But have that, if you're a bride getting married, have that already set up that best piece of advice. Have that all in a box ready to go. So all you have to do when the photographer gets there, just ship it on out to them so that they can organize it and create the realistic expectations that you expect from those. Small detail shots. Less stress on your plate. Yes, and also too, and I get it, we do hair. They don't know really what it entails, but a lot of the times you've been in another wedding. Yes. If you have access to your room or your bridal suite, make sure you can kind of set it up. Like where are the outlets gonna be? Where are they gonna put their tools? Because half the time we spend moving furniture around. Yeah or if we have a high chair or not. Yep. Or for makeup or we need a low back chair. Exactly. Or we're breaking our back spending over to accommodate our clients. 'cause we don't have the right setup. Exactly. And it's like if you're doing, we both do hair and makeup. Mm-hmm. So I work with a lot of makeup artists that they have their own chair, they have all their stuff. But for us, if we're doing both, it's like my makeup chair is not gonna work for my hair chair, and vice versa. So those are all things that when you check into the room, you know the hotels will accommodate like, oh, I need two higher chairs, or Can you bring another office chair? Do that too. That'll help save on the time. And when we say have pictures of work that you like. Do that, or I always recommend, hey, don't wanna stress you out, but if you can have the girls, send me pictures of what they're doing, so I already kind of know ahead of time mm-hmm. What it is I'm doing. And obviously a bride, we always obviously recommend a trial, but all those little things can help keep the timeline going and just realizing. We can't make up the time? Absolutely. The wedding I just did, we ended up starting later and I luckily, the hotel was great. They let me know the bridal suite. I had everything set up and two girls walked in. They're like, oh, well we don't know if we're supposed to be the ones that need to be done, so, um, we're gonna go to her room. And, and by the time back and forth, and the one that the bride had initially said to start. She was like, MIA doing stuff. And then the bride's like, oh my God. Okay. She's like looking, she's like, okay, we, I gotta get somebody. Just go. Just go. Because now it's already 15 minutes behind, So it's, and it all adds up as Yeah. Our whole point of, um, this episode, like this time is precious. Yeah. On those wedding mornings. And we are literally glued to the chair. Yes. We don't have time to pee. We don't have time to eat. If they say, oh, stop and take a break. No, we can't. Like we, we know we can't. We know that. After we eat, we get tired and slow down and we know that about us. So we'd rather be workhorses. Yeah. And finish everybody and then crash out, after touchups and stuff like that. But yeah, we cannot, time is precious and every minute counts on someone's wedding day. A hundred percent. And I just think it's being, as you, we try to buffer that. We try to block in enough time. Mm-hmm. But then we also deal with. You know, I have another wedding coming up and I said the start time that I know I need to accommodate. Mm-hmm. All these people with my team, and it was, well, we don't wanna get up that early, so we're gonna do it an hour later. Mm-hmm. But we talked to the photographer and the photographer's okay with it. We're gonna not do X, Y, and Z shots. Right. Well, I did email the photographer. The photographer never gotten back to me, but I'm like, I wanna make sure we're on the same page because I don't want it to look like it's on me. 'cause once again, they also are setting some of the rules and you have to kind of plant your feet down because some brides are, you meet, we have to start that early. Mm-hmm. Well, your photographer needs you already by 10 o'clock. Yes, your ceremony's at four, but he wants you ready at 10, so that means you're a bridal party of 12 people. We have to start earlier. So yeah, you could either skip that first look with your bridesmaids or, whatever. You could skip that and then you'll have extra time. Yeah, maybe an extra hour so you could sleep an extra hour. Yeah. But they don't like, and again. That's something that the tracks don't realize that we have to do. We have to deal with the heat of that, of being like, we gotta start at 5:00 AM or we have to start at three o'clock in the morning because you'll be ready at nine. Yeah. So it's, they don't see all of that and what we have to entail. So basically like our whole point of it, of the clap back is just something I feel like fellow makeup artists and hairdressers will totally be relate and a hundred percent agree. And hopefully if you are a photographer and you're listening to this. Have a little bit more grace. 'cause it's a lot. Yeah. I feel a lot harder in our shoes. Oh yeah. Than Mornington. So, and if there's one thing that I learned from, um, remember the girl that the bride that washed her makeup off and that she got Yes. The artist got dragged through the mud on social media. All hair and makeup artists rallied around her. Well, this is the same concepts we're rallying around and defending our case, essentially, because we just wanted to clear the air and just. Tell you that it's not that we're taking our sweet quality time. Mm-hmm. Well, we can when things are running smoothly, but there are other things that happen in life. Um, during the wedding day that happened, I had one story where the grandma fainted and she locked herself in the bathroom and, she wasn't feeling good. She was in her eighties and so. But naturally it's like heartbreaking to see that. And we're all worried and nervous and concerned, like, 'cause she hit her head on the, on the tub and everything. Oh my god. It, it was wild. So my whole point was, everything stops. Mm-hmm. Everything was put to a halt for at least 45 minutes because we were trying to get the grandma out of the bathroom. Yeah. And they were in an Airbnb. So they weren't able to take down the door. They didn't own the place. Yeah. So what were they gonna do? So it was actually funny 'cause my duck bill clip was able to pop the lock and get her out. But it took several minutes Yeah. Of trial and error to try and break this door down to save grandma. Luckily she ended up being okay and she went to the wedding and things were good. But these are things that do happen on people's wedding days that are obviously outta our control. That are outta our control. Yes, exactly. And thank God it was a stylist there that had a duck clip. Otherwise she'd still be in there. Because I know, right? I mean, so. These are things that people just don't realize that we do. Yeah. I mean, and like we had that one too. We could write a book. Oh, I have to go. Yeah. I have to go bring my dog and I have to do this., My God, yes. I wasn't the same care of no, you need to sit here and get her hair. Yeah. Like, we started an hour and a half later. Yes. The dog running around and, oh, I gotta do this and I gotta do that. Yeah. And plus this another speaking of dogs. I walked in one time to do a bridal party. We're ready to go. This hotel room was packed full of people. They had partied in it the night before. The whole jacuzzi tub was filled with water and balloons and I, we literally opened the door holding all of our equipment and a little dog runs out and I'm like, this is like chaotic and we have to work in this environment. So it's like sometimes the environment's a little yes. There was just stuff everywhere. Bottles everywhere. We're like, okay, where can we set up? You know? And this is why we drive home in silence. Oh yeah. Complete silence. Like we're so overstimulated. Complete silence. And even when I get home, I don't wanna talk to anybody. Leave me alone. I wanna crash out. I wanna veg out. Like, leave me alone. It's let me take a nap. Exactly. Exactly. So, you know, we just wanted to kind of like let all of our stylist friends, everybody know, like. We get it. Get it. We know the real story and we just wanted to put something out there because not for nothing. I don't want brides watching that and thinking, oh, it's all the hair and makeup people's fault. And like, no, it's really not. No. Yeah. And if you are a bride watching this, like take this all with a grain of salt. Yes. Yes. And, um, be mindful of this when preparing for the wedding morning and when hair and makeup says like, you need to be here and at least four or five girls a. It's for a reason. It is, and that's our whole thing. We just are trying to make your day go as smooth as possible. Get everybody done on time. Like we don't wanna add any stress to your day. We're there to take away the stress. So just, know that we are professionals and if we're telling you something, that's because we've done this a million times and we know what to expect. And if you are another stylist that you do hair and makeup, please share your stories with us because we would love to hear them. We would love to hear them. And I'm sure you guys have a ton Yes. From all of this. Like we could write a book Oh yeah. With everything that has happened in our careers. Absolutely. And I think it'd be a really interesting read. Oh, absolutely. So yeah guys, thank you, follow us on everything. Feel free to reach out to us. We'd love to hear your stories and also your take on this as well. Thank you for listening. Bye bye. That's a wrap on this episode of The Main Event. We're all about empowering our community and supporting each other, so if you love today's conversation, share it with a fellow stylist and let's grow together. Don't forget to subscribe and leave a review and connect with us on Instagram. At the Main Event Show or our YouTube both linked in our show notes below, got a topic you want us to cover, send us a dm. We'd love to hear from you. Until next time, keep creating, keep growing. And remember, you're a part of our family now.